Monday, February 12, 2007

something your relationship needs to know

thanks to a friend I've had a little discovery recently - the 5 languages of apology, by gary chapman. the one and same gary chapman who wrote the 5 love languages which if you haven't read I also really recommend (it helps you work out how you express and recieve love to help you communicate better with your partner, family & friends). so anyway, the languages of apology came up for fran and I and it made so much sense... if fran and I have a 'to do' and he needs to say sorry to me I have generally found his expression of apology lacking in intention and feeling and don't really feel like he understands how much he's hurt me or that he's really sorry and wants to make it up to me. then I read the language of apology thing and realised I really like him to show me he's sorry by making it up to me/doing something proactive to change. and it's so nice to know that his expression of apology is genuine but just a different form of communication to mine, which is a big verbal profuse gushing of apology! anyway, I thought I'd blog about it because I've mentioned it to a few friends and got the same reaction everytime... a pause of realisation ... and then 'oh yer, I hadn't thought of that' and it just made me think - how many times do issues not get resolved especially in marriages/partnerships because one person doesn't feel properly understood or their hurt made up for by an apology that is meanigful to them?

we got a message today from our rental agent that we have to be out of our place by march 28th - we kind of expected it after all the hassle with the mouldy rooms etc and I'm a bit suspicious they might try to screw us for every penny of the bond to make up for the work they had to do... how to be wise as serpents but innocent as doves with our rental agents...? unfortunately they have by far the most properties in town so there's a good chance the next place will be with them too... prayer appreciated for another place to rent - we'd like a house (not unit/apartment) with 2+ bedrooms, a bath and garage in a sunny location on the frankton side of town and not at the top of a mahussive hill for $350 a week or less, which is quite a tall order!

I fancy coffee all the time at the moment. I'm not sure if it's just a change in taste or the slow start of an addiction, but I find myself daydreaming about having a coffee machine that makes cappucinos at home. maybe one day...

Thursday, February 08, 2007

day of firsts

yesterday was a day of firsts. I got up to take fran to work and have the car for the day, and morning haze made a gorgeous light effect as the sun rose over the remarkables with the sharp rock edges cutting through the hazy light. and it was while trying to take pictures of this I had my first first - a 10,000+ volt shock from an electric deer fence! not only did it hurt a fair bit, but left me wibbling for about 30 mins and made a couple of nice red lines along my arm where I had unknowingly been touching the offending wire! won't be making that mistake again... my other first was far more pleasant - my first swim in the lake. I've been avoiding this because lake wakatipu is freezing and varies by 2 degrees centigrade winter to summer, fluctating around the 6 degree mark I believe. fran went with some guys after work and I'm glad to say they found a warm bit! I did not do the crazy huge rope swing or jump off the 20ft platform but did manage a nice 10 mins floating around in the 'warm' top layer before permanent goose bumps occured! might have to try and find a warmer swimming option for next time :)

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

summer sun

we're having a nice englishy mix of summer weather, with some days hot, sunny & gorgeous like this one in queenstown botanical gardens, and some cold, chilly & wet. fran's still working pretty hard, so on yesterday's quiet afternoon he took the chance to get home early and participate in his favorite afternoon activity - snooozing!

our lease on our unit runs out on march 18th and we don't know if we're able to renew, though we would really love to move to a house with bath and garage in frankton - where the sun shines all winter long! your prayers would be appreciated there as a house with 2/3 bedrooms for the money we want to be spending will be hard to find and would need to tie in with the expiry on this place.